We all meet a lot of people in our lives – at our college, at our job, extended family,the ones we call friends or lovers, sometimes spouses and so many others. While there will be a few people who will give you utter happiness, there are a few those will always just make you wonder why do they even exist?
I was myself unaware about this kind of a relationship until some time back.
A toxic relationship is any relationship which is not favorable for you.
It could be a bad spirited colleague, a bullying aunt, a back stabbing family member or an always discouraging friend. We usually say that you can not clap with one hand, but in this case its not necessary that both the human beings sharing this relationship are poisonous or negatively oriented. Toxic people are hardly aware of their own toxicity. They are mostly the ones who live in insecurities and always keep their selfish motives above everything else. They will always be absorbed in their own emotions, interests and goals.
While you might turn to them for some emotional support they will always use your emotions for their own benefit. They play with your mind, they try to season you according to them and if you dont act as per them they can turn really aggressive and deadly.
These people mostly wear masks on their faces, not a lot of people will know about their selfish motives, they can often come across to others as ideals – obviously because they wear a mask.
Their own insecurities lead them to over think and judge – situations & people. Because they lack personal insight they will never know how wrong they are. They will never agree that they are at fault.
They always make you feel emotionally and psychologically distressed.
To know that you are in a Toxic relationship – ask yourself
• Do you feel emotionally drained out after you interact with that particular person?
• Do you dread to see them?
If the answer is yes, you have to decide. Its hazardous for your mental health to continue keeping such people on your list. They will never be happy for you or never be sad if anything wrong happens to you, they might rather feel happy.
I used to read how successful people often talk about cutting the ties from people who negatively impacted their life. Now i understand why it is important, their emotional drama will always keep pulling you down and not let you focus on bigger things in life and hence never let you grow.
To continue these kind of relationships means a never ending anxiety, stress and troubles.
In my opinion we can not heal Toxic relationships – because these relationships are based on a jealous and judgmental mindset, and mindsets dont change. It occurs due to 2 extreme thought processes and their hyper critical behavior.
Because of their Me vs You attitude you can never come at a consensus with them and hence things can never get better because they will consistently chase you, try to dominate/control you and always play blame games.
It is highly recommended to cut ties with such people as soon as possible before they start affecting you mental health and physical being in a very hazardous way.
It might be difficult at first and might cause them do even more emotional drama, but once you have identified them – knock them off (I dont mean kill them), but knock them off your list. They are not your people, they aren’t your tribe. And anyone who pulls you down has no place in your life.
After reading this article I am certain a lot of you will be able to identify who that Toxic person in your life is. They put us in so much self doubt and mess that we often end up reviewing our conversations and meetings with them.
In case any of my reader wants to share their story with me or want my help on how to get over with their TOXIC relationship you can email me, DM me.
I will be more than happy to help.
Love & power,